According to the good pleasure of His will.

Hello fam! This past month has been a whirlwind for sure! It’s funny to me, because I asked the Lord to use my life and what He shows me to be a testimony to help others see Jesus. Let me just tell you…when you ask, you shall receive! I never want to post anything that is to glorify myself or post because of the pressure just to make a post. I want what I write to pierce hearts because they experience Jesus through what I share. I want Jesus to be glorified above it all. In order to do that, I wait for the Lord. So, I’m about to share part of the journey the Lord walked me through recently. Get ready! A month ago, while school was online because of a small outbreak of the virus, I experienced a sharp pain in my chest. Typically, when I feel pain that is out of the ordinary in my body, I pray in intercession for someone who may be having those symptoms. The Holy Spirit has used me in the past to stand in the gap for someone else’s healing. So, I thought this was another chance to intercede. The feeling in my chest was like a heart attack, so I started praying for whoever may be having a heart attack or similar symptoms. I go to bed and am feeling better. Throughout the week though the pain continued. I was like oh no Lord! I know I can’t be having a heart attack. I know you didn’t move me all the way to Florida just to die. I refuse to believe that! After church service that Sunday I asked for prayer. The pain left. Then I woke up the next morning and the pain came back. At this point I am frightened. I reach out to my aunt, who is a nurse and explain the symptoms I am experiencing. She says that she does not believe it is cardiac related and that it could be from stress or anxiety. I’m like anxiety???? Anxiety?! On my way to work I have a talk with the Holy Spirit about it. I begin to go into detail of what could cause my anxiety. I realize finances have been a stressor for me. I started a new job and the hours I thought I would work were not what I anticipated especially with school starting. I was about to reach the end of my savings towards the end of the year. I was like Lord, it would be nice to not have a car payment. That would almost cut my finances in half. I told the Lord that I am doing everything I can possibly think of to provide for myself. That He brought me here, so it is His reputation on the line and not mine. I can’t believe I said this next part, but I said, “Good luck with that!” Ha, the Lord of Lords does not need luck. I repent! I then realize the second stressor. It was doubt in my heart. Over the Summer the Holy Spirit revealed this doubt while reading the book of Matthew. Jesus said to Peter in Matthew 14:31 TPT, “What little faith you have! Why would you let doubt win?” I thought I had released the doubt, but I hadn’t. I was saying, Lord I trust You with my life, but deep in my heart of hearts I didn’t. There was still doubt in my heart that began to grow. I began to believe the lie that maybe what God told me He would do in my life wouldn’t come to fruition. Maybe I am not worthy of receiving all that He promised. While looking at pictures on my phone, I came across a memory from when I worked at Cardinal Health in Columbus right before I moved to Orlando. It was a post-it note that said, “Stop guessing. Remember My promises. I’m never going to let you down.” I bawled. Holy Spirit thank You for the reminder! That night though, I could not sleep. The anxiety got so bad that I was afraid to fall asleep in fear that I would die. I started declaring scripture and the promises that He spoke. I finally fell asleep. The next day I decided that I needed to tell someone what I was experiencing. I called one of my closest friends and told her everything. That I had anxiety that stemmed from finances and doubt in the Lord. She began to pray and speak life over me. Later that night she calls me back with her husband and they say that they want to pay off my car!! Yes, you read that right. They wanted to pay off my car so that I would no longer have a car payment!! Like, what?! I didn’t even tell them about the request I made to the Lord to not have a car payment! Wow!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!!! The next week, on a Monday I wake up to a text of the money being sent to my bank account. I finally get to pay off my car!! I pay it off immediately and start rejoicing in my room. I get to school, and a student stops me to tell me she has something for me. She hands me a blue rose and said that the Lord told her to buy this for me and that He said “You are My daughter”. He also gave her Ephesians 1:5, “having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself; according to the good pleasure of His will.” I was like girl, you have no idea what this means! I just paid off my car today because of Jesus and He used you as icing on the cake to tell me that I am His daughter! My mind is blown! Also, blue is my favorite color. What really rocked me is that it’s according to the good pleasure of His will. It’s His pleasure! I love You Lord! Thank You for loving me!

It doesn’t stop there. 😊 I go to a wedding in Ohio the following week. I’m single, so when the bride was about to toss the bouquet, of course I am there! Just to let ya’ll know a little bit about me. I am super competitive. Normally at weddings I am going after that bouquet full force!! It is mine! This time though, I was so at peace with where God had me in that moment. I said, Lord I’m happy with just You and me. I stood there not wanting to attack the other women. Lol. When the beautiful bride went to toss the bouquet, it was like slow motion. I stood there, saw it coming, lifted my hands to receive and it came right to me! Not even joking. One of the groomsmen was so shocked he said, “Wow Taja that literally came right to you.” I was like I know!! So crazy! In that moment I heard the Holy Spirit say, “That is exactly what it is like to be My daughter. You do not have to do anything but lift up your hands and receive.” Wow. Isn’t that precious? I forgot to mention that the anxiety and pain in my chest went away completely! 1 Peter 5:7 says, “casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.” I am a daughter of the Most High God who wants to shower me with His love and blessings. He wants to carry the weight of my burdens. That’s why He died! All God requires from us is to trust in His love and provision and receive it. You too can receive. Not from striving. Not by defeating and competing against your brothers or sisters. By just being you! A daughter or a son. Just be you. Trust that your Heavenly Father will place everything you need in your hands in His perfect timing. It is according to the good pleasure of His will.